#31 - What If My Child Isn't Into Food Play?

Hello! Welcome back to Episode #31 of the Food Explorers Podcast.

Before we dive in, I want to take a second to remind you that my very first FREE challenge Camp Food Explorers begins one week from today.

If you are tired of the constantly fighting with your child to try new foods, you’re going to want to listen up. Camp Food Explorers is absolutely FREE 3-day challenge taking place on July 9 to July 11, 2023.

In this challenge i’m going to to teach your family how to introduce a new food, and have fun doing it.   Each child has a unique sensory system, and with my guidance you will select a food that align with your child's preferences, ensuring a positive and engaging experience from day one.

Through playful summer-camp-inspired activities on day two, I’ll show you how to remove the fear often associated with trying unfamiliar foods, making mealtime a fun and exciting adventure.

But it doesn't stop there—on day three, we'll focus on building the bond between you and your child at the table, fostering a positive relationship with food and creating lasting habits. I know you may already be thinking - this sounds great, but I don’t have time for that. I want to remind you that this is 3 DAYS only. And you need just 10 minutes a day to do this. You can do anything for 3 days.

Stop letting food battles dictate your family's dinner time; join Camp Food Explorers and lean into creating positive mealtime memories and build adventurous eating habits. Sign up now at www.drsamgoldman.com/campfoodexplorers. Seriously, if you don’t join us for this one, you’re going to be missing out. 

Ok, what you are here for. Today’s topic is a personal one. I have done food play with my niece a TON and usually she loves it. But, the other day my sister tried one of the activities for her, and she told me “it didn’t work.” Of course, I had a lot of questions about what exactly went down, and what’ didn’t work. And i wanted to share this process of what goes in my mind with you. Because I know this is a really important topic that almost every single parent will encounter at some point.

Food play isn’t an absolute yes, or the magic answer every single time.

We all have those days when kids are tired or simply not in the mood for adventurous eating. And guess what? That's okay! Just, like us, they’re human. In this episode, we'll explore strategies and alternative approaches to keep the food exploration journey enjoyable for both you and your child.

• First off, let's consider the circumstances surrounding your child's disinterest in food play. Are they tired or exhausted from a long day at school? Camp? Did they not sleep well last night? Are they just crabby? Just like us, children need downtime too. Sometimes, they may just want to sit and enjoy familiar foods that provide comfort. We can't blame them for that! It's important to acknowledge where their body is that day, and what it needs.

• Another factor to consider is whether the activity itself is too challenging for your child. We might mistake disinterest for a lack of engagement when, in reality, the activity might be overwhelming or beyond their current capabilities. In occupational therapy, we talk about the concept of the "just-right-challenge." It's about finding activities that are slightly challenging but not too difficult. If the activity feels too hard, your child is more likely to shut down. So, think about how you can make it more accessible and enjoyable for them.
  
  
• Furthermore, if your child doesn't even want to come to the table, it's essential to create a calm and inviting atmosphere first. If they're not hungry or in a heightened fight-or-flight response, introducing a game or activity might not be well-received. The initial step is to have them come to the table in a relaxed state. In fact, sometimes the table isn’t even the right setting for food play for your child. Some children respond better to food play outside of traditional mealtime. Consider offering it during other parts of the day when they are more receptive and open to exploration.

I know a big question parents have here is - how are they going to eat enough then?

I view food play as an opportunity for children to learn and develop skills around new foods. However, I don't see it primarily as a means to increase the quantity of food consumed. That's why it's crucial to establish habits and routines around the table that foster eating, rather than stifling it. In our Food Explorers Membership, we have an entire training section dedicated to setting up the table for success.

So, what can you do when your child isn't keen on participating in food play? Here are a few options to consider:

1. Option #1: Set a boundary that each time you offer a new food, you choose 1 way to learn about. Remind your child that they don't have to eat it or engage in any activity they're not ready for, but they do need to choose at least one way to learn about the food that day. It can be as simple as looking at it, touching it, or talking about it.
   
   Provide them with alternative options for engagement, as each child's preferences may vary. I also recommend connecting with their interests. Sometimes, children may not be enthusiastic about food play because they haven't found a connection between their existing interests and the world of food. This is especially true for older children.
   
   Get creative and find ways to incorporate their passions into the food exploration process. If your child loves dinosaurs, for example, consider creating a prehistoric-themed food adventure with edible fossils or dinosaur-shaped snacks. By aligning their interests with food play, you can capture their attention and make the experience more appealing.
   
   
2. Option #2: Reflect on whether the activity you're proposing is too challenging for your child. For instance, if they can't stand the sight of a banana and the activity involves squishing it, it might not be the best match. Remember the "just-right-challenge" principle and adjust the activity to make it more approachable and enjoyable for them.
   
   
3. Option #3: Consider if the plate you presented actually works for your child. Did you offer a safe food? Is the serving size of the non-preferred food overwhelming? Your child needs to first feel comfortable with the plate, and knowing they’re not going to be pressured to eat something just because they played with it.
   
   
4. Option #4: Try food play in a different setting, away from the table. If the table has become a stressful place for your child, they might have difficulty opening up to food play during mealtimes. In such cases, initiate food play as a separate, dedicated play activity outside of mealtime. While it may require a little extra effort on your part, you might be pleasantly surprised to find that your child becomes more receptive to exploring and learning about new foods when the pressure of mealtime is removed.
   
   
5. Option #5: Shift the focus away from the new food. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been shut down when working with a child when I first offer an activity. Recently I was working with a child and they straight up told me “i’m not going to do that.” My response? You absolutely don’t need to if you’re not ready to. Lets find another way to learn about it. And we shifted the activity. Now, your child might not be ready to engage with that food at all! In this case, I usually shift away from the nonpreferred food, and start food play with a food they already know and love. Then, i try to slowly try to make my way back over to the new food.
   
   
6. Option #6: Make it a family affair. Sometimes, children may be more receptive to food play if the entire family is involved. Seeing their sibling enjoying and experimenting with different foods can be motivating and encourage your child to join in the fun. Plan family food exploration nights where everyone gets to try new foods and engage in playful activities together. By fostering a supportive and inclusive environment, your child will feel more encouraged and motivated to participate in food play.

Remember, the key is to approach food play with patience, flexibility, and an open mind. Not every strategy may work for your child, and that's perfectly normal. Stay attuned to their needs, interests, and preferences, adjusting the approach as necessary.  Celebrate the small victories and keep the exploration process light-hearted and enjoyable. The goal is to cultivate a positive and enjoyable relationship with food, one playful bite at a time.

And … because i Know it can be hard to think of new options when your child isn’t into the one you offered. I have something exciting to tell you...

I need your help to spread the word about Camp Food Explorers, and so I thought I would offer a little incentive. I’m giving away a FREE copy of my 101 Food Play Ideas checklist to 1 lucky person. All you have to do is share in your stories any of my posts or reels about Camp Food Explorers from my Instagram page @DrSamGoldman and tag me in it. Every single time you share one will be an additional entry. So go over to Instagram, and share one now for your chance to win. Thank you again for joining me today, I hope you feel motivated and excited to make some adjustments in your food play journey. I’ll see you next time!

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